


The Light and the Torch

by damianknight



Category: Pendragon - D. J. MacHale
Genre: Action/Adventure, F/M, Love, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-19
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2018-04-10 02:32:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 21,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4373828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/damianknight/pseuds/damianknight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is an alternate ending to the Pendragon series, mainly focused on the chemistry between Bobby and Loor as they attempt to rebuild their relationship. Please let me know in the comments if you'd like to read more. Constructive criticism is always welcomed. Thank you.</p><p>Also, <a href="http://damian-knight.tumblr.com/">here</a> is my tumblr that I created. I'll be posting updates and stuff on it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A New Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Press gives everyone a chance.

Journal #38

Hello to…myself. Yeah, that's right. Since I don't have a Traveler ring anymore that can send my journals through space and time to my friends Mark and Courtney, I suppose I'll be reading this to myself. But why bother writing it down in the first place? I guess I've gotten so used to writing down things that this just comes naturally. And besides, I have no clue when I'm actually going to disappear and pop back to Solara so I should write this down in the off chance someone else might pick this up and read a little about Bobby Pendragon, trapped Traveler on Zadaa. Yeah, that's right. Trapped Traveler on Zadaa, home to the Batu and Rokador…and Loor.

All right, let me just rewind a bit for the sake of a stranger who happens to see this. My name is Bobby Pendragon. I'm a Traveler, meaning I'm a very old spirit in physical form. I, along with some other Travelers, just managed to defeat this very bad spirit called Saint Dane. Saint Dane wanted to destroy all of Halla, or everything that have and has ever existed. After the battle, every single Traveler was supposed to go back to Solara, the essence of Halla, and become a spirit again. All of the Travelers besides me and Uncle Press had already left. I stayed behind because I needed more time to finish what I thought would be my last journal. While I was with Uncle Press, I gave him a piece of my mind. Why should we have to go back to Solara now, when all the trouble was over? We were the soldiers of Halla. We fought the war to protect everything we knew and loved. The motivation for fighting stemmed from our love for our homes. And just when we thought we could relax and rebuild our lives, we learned that we had to give it all up. I understood that our purpose was to fight and leave—that's why we were Travelers. But it just wasn't fair.

With that being said, I finished my journal and went back to Uncle Press. He was standing just as I had left him, on top of the Ravinian star. My approaching footsteps didn't make him look up and smile at me. Instead, he appeared deep in thought, with furrows etched into his forehead. I waved my journal at him.

"All right I'm done. Now what?" I asked, trying not to sound too down. The idea of leaving behind all I'd ever known wasn't the greatest.

"I'm starting to question whether or not my intentions were good."

Woah. That was unexpected. And bad. Uncle Press usually didn't have to think about his intentions because really, they were always good.

"Tell me more," I shot back.

He stayed silent for a few more moments. Finally, he looked up and gave me a small smile. I knew that smile. It meant "I-know-exactly-what-you-want-and-I'm-thinking-about-giving-it-to-you." I resisted giving a tap dance for joy. Uncle Press faced me full on and opened his arms wide.

"You know Bobby, for such a young kid, you've really got some brains. Must be from me," he joked.

"Yeah, sure. What's going on?" I asked excitedly.

Uncle Press gave me a bigger smile.

"You're right about it being not fair. I want to give you all a chance at a life after Saint Dane. I don't know if this is the right thing to do, but it seems like it was meant to be."

Whoo! Now this was more like it! I ran up to him and gave him a big old hug. I could have kissed him if I thought he'd enjoy it. He laughed and shoved me off playfully.

"Cool, so how are we going to do this?" I was practically bouncing around.

"Not so fast wise guy. First you have to know what you want. Once you go, there can't be any changes. Time must take its course," he calmly said.

Okay. Good. What did I want? My thoughts immediately went to Courtney and Mark. Maybe I could stay here and help rebuild everything. Create a new civilization. Mack some more with Courtney and go fishing with Mark. But then I slowed down. I know I've said this before, but Courtney and I, well I don't know. I'm sure I could have a good time with her, and I'm sure we could have some sort of a future together. But as what? If I actually thought about it, which I was doing now, I couldn't imagine being with her as a boyfriend or husband. Not yet at least. We had grown too apart and too different to easily fit back together. I couldn't even think about kissing her without feeling all sorts of awkward. I didn't love her in a romantic way. That spark wasn't really there. And I was sure if Courtney opened her heart, she would agree with me. Maybe not on everything but on the important points.

Truth was, I loved Loor. Plain and simple. I liked Courtney a lot, but I loved Loor. And the important thing was, Loor had feelings for me too. When I was pulling away from Courtney, Loor was pulling me towards her. I read somewhere that complete strangers grow closer to each other in intense situations than friends do in a lifetime. Something about how stress brings people together. And Loor and I had experienced enough stress for two lifetimes. I wanted her bravery and selflessness. I wanted her compassion and companionship. She had put herself in danger countless times for me. That day on Zadaa, near the flume. When she heard the flume activating, she pulled me behind her. And Saint Dane had killed her. And I went ballistic. I needed her. She brought me out of my ignorant shell at the very beginning and walked by me until the very end. She was always my go-to Traveler in times of crisis. I wanted to see her smile and laugh. I wanted to feel her presence close to mine. And most of all, I wanted to hold her to her word—that perhaps if given another chance, she would kiss me that night in the rain.

Courtney and Mark. Mark, my best friend since childhood. And Courtney, my biggest crush since grade school. That was the natural way. I was from Second Earth and with Second Earthlings I should stay. Heck, that logic didn't make sense. We were on Third Earth. Not mixing territories, or worlds, wasn't possible anymore. The real question was, did I deserve to put my own happiness before the happiness of others? Could I have the chance to be selfish? Should I ditch my two greatest friends who literally risked their lives for me, not because it was their duty but because of their love? If Courtney or Mark knew that I would choose Loor over them, man, I didn't even want to think about that. I would basically negate every single thing they'd ever done for me.

But I wanted Loor!

I sat down, my knees suddenly weak. Geez. Get a grip, I told myself. I thought about my earlier argument, that I should stay with Mark and Courtney because they were the natural way my life would've taken if I didn't find out I was a Traveler. But was that the natural way? After all, the reality was, I didn't belong to any territory. I wasn't really human. I had been put on Second Earth to fight Saint Dane. Courtney and Mark and Stony Brook and basketball and everything else just kind of got in the way of my true natural fate. But what did fate matter now? I had strong bonds with both my Second Earth friends and my Traveler friends. I may be a spirit and I may call home Second Earth instead of Solara but really the two weren't compatible. I couldn't have the best of both worlds, literally. I had to choose.

I let out a huge sigh. Uncle Pressed gave me a sideways glance but didn't ask. If I was going to choose Loor, I had to explain to Courtney and Mark in person. Another thought stopped me. If I chose Loor, would I still be the person Loor liked? The selfless guy who put others before him at all times? Would this be a signal that once something better than her came along, I would ditch her and go after it like how I was ditching Courtney and Mark?

I shook my head. If I stayed with Courtney and Mark, I knew I'd be regretting my decision for the rest of my life. I knew what type of future I had with those guys. It would be a happy one. But I wanted to get the chance to find out what a future with Loor would be like. Course, I'd feel horrible about leaving my two friends behind, but that wouldn't cause me to regret my decision cause I'd be with the one person I needed. And I didn't want regret. Didn't I deserve what I wanted for once? Man, that sounded totally bratty. I had to stop or else I'd be arguing with myself for the rest of my life. This was going to get ugly, fast. But the only way to find out was to act.

I looked back at Uncle Press. He raised his eyebrows, waiting.

"Okay. I don't know if this is the right thing to do, but I want to be with Loor. I gotta explain to Mark and Courtney before I go anywhere." There. I said it. But I didn't really feel too dreadful. Maybe because I finally came face to face with my selfishness instead of having it gnaw away at me inside.

"You sure? She could be tough to live with," Uncle Press joked, trying to lift my mood.

I wasn't smiling.

"I'll call everyone back now. We'll figure out how to complete things from there," he told me.

"Fine. But I need to find Courtney and Mark right now, before anything major happens," I replied, already turning towards the Taj Mahal entrance. I wanted to explain to Mark and Courtney first, and then see Loor. Uncle Press nodded once and turned away. There was a rushing noise that grew louder in volume. I assumed that was the sound of Solaran spirits returning back to Third Earth. I didn't stop to check it out though. I quickly stalked out of the building. Where would they go?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	2. I Left My Heart With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby explains.

It was pretty quiet outside the Taj Mahal—a completely different scene from a few weeks earlier when we first got rid of Saint Dane. The Ravinians and the exiles would work on projects during the day and have ear-splitting parties during the night. Uncle Press was right. The conclave was just a fancy prison. Saint Dane wanted everything to be prim and proper so none of the Ravinians could really let loose. Once victory was achieved, the exiles were ecstatic. Their happiness and excitement naturally pulled in the Ravinians and a whole lot of partying happened. Now, things were starting to die down.

I passed a group of food workers who were getting ready to work on the new farms outside the conclave. Another group of builders hurried by. I recognized a few exiles and waved, but they were too busy studying their blueprints to wave back. Yet another knot of people strolled by. Everywhere I looked, people were gathering and doing constructive things, regardless if they were Ravinians or exiles. The collective goal was to rebuild and restart. The future looked promising.

All this wasn't helping me find Mark and Courtney though. The thought of them made me feel light headed again. The next few minutes would probably be the hardest minutes of my life—betraying my friends for my own selfish desires. A thought occurred to me. I could just leave Third Earth and hop over to Zadaa without them being any wiser. But that thought made me ashamed. They deserved to know. And Loor would definitely kick me out of her house after finding out that I just dumped my best friends without any explanations.

Where were they? Both of them were the head liasons. Courtney had a special bond with the exiles while Mark was cool with the rebels. Together, they helped bridge differences between their two groups and the Ravinians. That probably meant that they were near the Eiffel Tower. Lately all liason meetings were being held there.

The sun was starting to get a bit hot, burning the back of my neck. Sweat trickled down my brow as I jogged over to the Tower. I was right. There was definitely something going on at the base, and I spotted Mark and Courtney in the midst of a throng of people. Courtney looked like she was shouting at someone while waving her arms erratically around. Mark was calmer but the rigid set of his jaw warned me that something wasn't right. I slowed down, straining my ears to catch the sounds of the argument.

"I'm telling you, we need that space beside the statue for our meeting house! Where else can we fit all our members?" a squeaky voice demanded.

Courtney rolled her eyes and folded her arms. "And I'm telling you that we can't afford to be selfish. Everyone has to share! Stop setting a bad example for everyone! Why is that area so important to you anyway?"

I finally got close enough that I could see what was going on. It seemed like Courtney was arguing with a short squat man. He was livid, his hands balled up into fists. I recognized him. He was one of the exiles. Why would an exile argue with Courtney? They were from the same group. She was his leader.

The short man seemed to swell with fury. He jabbed his finger into Courtney's chest and rocked up onto his tiptoes to look her in the eye. She didn't flinch, matching his stare with a glare of her own. Boy, she was intense. That's one of the biggest reasons why I fell for her. She could take the heat without batting an eyelash. And when things got hairy, she'd come out swinging. Of course, that was a quality Loor had as well. Hell, how or why did Loor even come up? I pushed her out of my mind. No, I needed to focus on Courtney right now.

"Why? Because I want it! Is that too much to ask?" the man fumed. "We have no control over our lives anymore! Is asking for a nice place to build our home too unreasonable?" He turned away from her and hunched his shoulders, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

Courtney's expression suddenly softened. She reached out and gently laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, Ruben. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that," she answered quietly.

He didn't respond but his pose relaxed somewhat. I hovered on the fringes of the group, afraid to interrupt a moment.

"Look, I know it's hard right now. Being sucked away from everything you've ever known. And having no say in what happens to you next. But, we're all stuck here. There's no going back. I know you Ruben. You're stronger than this. You've been through so much without cracking. I need you here now. To be a role model. We can't all get what we want right now. We need to compromise. I know the place you're talking about. It's really beautiful. But we need that space to build our backup generators. You said so yourself just a few days ago."

Ruben sighed and turned around. He tiredly nodded at Courtney.

"I know. I'm sorry for what I said as well. You're right. I concede. I'll get started on those generator plans then," he stated.

Courtney smiled and threw her arms around him. The rest of the group started patting him on the back and slowly dispersed. I watched, grinning. Courtney had such a way with people. She was truly someone everyone trusted to get the job done. I was still smiling like an idiot when Mark looked up and spotted me. An equally wide grin split his face as he walked over. Why did he look so happy? Oh right, he thought I already dematerialized and went back to Solara. Seeing me here, well, that could lead to all sorts of wrong assumptions. Assumptions I'd have to refute.

"Bobby! What are you doing here? Enjoyed the show? Looks like Courtney's still got it." He winked roguishly, slinging an arm around my shoulders. I felt joy radiating from his being. He totally thought I was coming back to stay.

"Yeah, I wouldn't want to cross her, like ever. Long story though. Just give me a minute," I said back tensely. It wasn't because I was nervous that I was going to tell my two best friends that I wanted to leave them for some warrior girl worlds away. Or that Courtney would punch my head off. Or Mark would help with the punching since he was buff now. Nope, I wasn't nervous at all. Who was I kidding. I was sweating buckets and my forehead felt clammy.

Courtney turned away from Ruben and looked at me full on. I saw the fire in her eyes. She smiled and swept her hair back from her forehead as she advanced. God, she was so lovely. Scary, but beautiful. Those were the exact words I used to describe her to Mark ten years ago, when we were still in grade school, and I had the biggest crush-in-the-history-of-crushes on her.

"Still here? Couldn't decide to leave? I knew I was irresistible to you Bobby Pendragon," she laughed as she enveloped me in a hug.

I hugged her back. What should I say? When should I say it? How should I say it?

"I'm leaving you guys for Loor."

No! Did that actually come out of my mouth? I stepped back from Courtney's frozen figure. Mark hastily unslung his arm and also stepped back. We stood facing each other. Or rather, I stood there, facing my two best friends who looked like I just slapped them. I couldn't blame them.

"No, I'm sorry that was the wrong way to say it. But it's the truth. Uncle Press gave all of us travelers a choice. It was to stay or go back to Solara. And—and I'm going to stay. But I want to find Loor. I'm sorry, guys. I'll always love you."

My explanation sounded lame, even to me. But at least I said it. Mark and Courtney stood rooted to the spot, neither of them moving. My palms started to sweat like crazy. I'd never been more nervous or panicked in my life. Not when I accidentally scored a point for the opposing team by dunking the ball into the wrong basket. Not when Shannon had to go to the hospital because she broke her ankle. Not when I walked into the final showdown with Saint Dane. And not even that day Courtney leaned in to kiss me.

The impossible happened again. Courtney Chetwynde started to cry. It was heart wrenching. And Mark had his arms around her, trying to comfort her as she sobbed. But as soon as I reached out, she snapped. Spinning around she speared me with her stare.

"What are you talking about? Is this a joke Bobby Pendragon? Because it's not funny!"

"Courtney, you know I'd never joke about something like that. This is real. And, I'm so sorry. No one deserves this. I'm not a good person for doing this to you guys. I'm being so selfish. But—"

Courtney threw back her head and laughed. It was eerie. Mark stood by silently, his eyes filled with something I couldn't place. Betrayal? Disgust? Anger? Sadness? A combination of everything?

"I knew it. Loor. She's always been the one for you, hasn't she? You know, you could've just told me that I'm not good enough for you," she snarled, positively spitting. Her long brown hair swung about her face as she gesticulated into the air.

"Courtney. That's not fair. I did love you, once upon a time. We could've had it all. But you know why it didn't work out. We don't love each other anymore," I said dejectedly, twisting my hands together. This was not going well. But to be fair, what else should I have expected?

"But I did love you Bobby! You were ripped out of my life. We couldn't help it. And now you're back. I can't believe you wouldn't want to take the chance to be something together! I can't—" Courtney choked out before she started to cry again, tears running down her cheeks. She abruptly turned away and buried her face in her hands, sobs wracking her frame.

I looked at Mark helplessly. He stared back, his expression blank and broken.

"How long have you been thinking about this Bobby? Are we not a good enough reason for you to s-stay?" he asked in that. The stutter made me stumble forward. It felt like someone drove a shard of ice into my heart. He hadn't stuttered for such a long time. This must've been killing him. But as I stretched out my arms, he backed away towards Courtney. He looked at me like I was some kind of a predatory animal. I dropped my hands. I was an awful person. I shouldn't be doing this. They didn't deserve this. My best friends who've had my back for so long. No. This wasn't right.

We stood there for ages. I shifted my weight from one foot to the other and looked everywhere but at my friends. I directed my eyes upwards at the sky. The sunlight was blinding. I lowered my head, trying to escape the light. It illuminated every strand of hair on Courtney's head. I could see all the blemishes on Mark's face, from the years of acne he suffered through. Everything looked brighter and clearer. Things that had to be said were being brought out into the open. The truth was laid out. My friends could really see who I was, for the first time, in this light.

Minutes dragged by, turning into hours. Courtney was now huddled on the ground, Mark stroking her hair beside her. I was still in the same position as before, standing stiffly upright. Thoughts kept racing through my head. What the hell was I doing to the people who loved me the most in Halla? I almost made up my mind to stay with them when Courtney gave one last sniffle and slowly stood up. She hurriedly wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and straightened her shoulders.

"You're right. I don't love you anymore. I haven't loved you for a while now."

Ouch. That sort of hurt my ego. But it made sense because it was the truth. We couldn't love each other. Not after what we'd been through, with and without each other. I hesitantly stepped toward her. She flinched. I stopped.

"Courtney, we may not love each other romantically, but you and Mark should both know that I love you guys for everything you guys are and have done for me and Halla. I'm sorry that's not enough for me to stay with you guys, but it's the way I feel. I'm trying to be completely honest here because you guys deserve it."

Courtney didn't answer then. But Mark did.

"Bobby," he began, but seemed uncertain about what he should say next.

His uncertainty broke me. I fiercely shook my head. I would regret this. For the rest of my existence. But I couldn't do it. I wasn't strong enough to say no, to put myself first. I wasn't selfish enough.

"Forget it guys. Forget I even brought this up. I'm staying," I sighed and then tried to smile. I was trying too hard to convince myself. This was not good.

"Bobby. No. Don't do this to yourself. You're right. You deserve to be happy, too. And if it's not with us, I rather it be with—with Loor. She's good for you," Mark finished. He let out a gusty breath and looked at Courtney, who nodded slowly.

I stared, dumbfounded. What happened to my angry and rightfully possessive best friends? I opened my mouth to argue when Courtney raised her hand.

"Mark's right. I was angry. I wanted you to stay. And when you said you wanted Loor, well, I was jealous. I wanted to hurt you. But Bobby, if there's someone who deserves to let go of his best friends to chase after another woman, it's you. And I know, that sounds mean and I'm sorry it came out that way, but like you said, we're being completely honest with each other, right? And in Loor's case you'll not only have an amazing … girlfriend but also an amazing friend in general."

Wow. What a turnaround. They were too good for me. That's why they'll always be my best friends. Because they just wanted the best for me, no matter how much it hurt them. And like a brat, I took the out they gave me.

"Guys, you have no idea what this means to me. Frankly, if you guys didn't give me your go-ahead I think I'll still be here. I wouldn't feel right, leaving you guys without you guys accepting it before I left. So thank you guys again. I love you both so much," I stammered.

We all stepped then, wrapping our arms around each other. Now the timing was right. I breathed in the scent of Courtney. She smelled like freshly mown grass, honeysuckle, and wood. Loving, independent, and strong. Mark smelled like leather, sea salt, and rain. Loyal, down-to-earth, and understanding. I closed my eyes, trying to take in everything during that moment. The way they felt, the way I felt. How warm and comforting this hug was. How we tried to put all our feelings into this one simple gesture because we knew there was no time left for words. This was the final goodbye.

We broke apart. The sun was starting to set. The light was no longer so blinding or searing. I looked at both of them. They smiled back. Our friendship survived so much. An evil demonic spirit. Time. Death. Destruction. And betrayal. But it was still there. I was the luckiest person in Halla. If there was only some way to bring them with me. But as Uncle Press said, there could be no more mixing of territories.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye then. You'll always be my best friend," Mark said, casting a sidelong glance at me.

"As will you, Mark. Don't let Courtney be a pain in the ass," I said as evenly as I could, returning his glance.

"How about you try not to be a pain in the ass to Loor. Because, like me, she'll kick your butt." Courtney tilted her head and pulled up the corner of her mouth. Her blasé retort was slightly ruined by the way her voice shook.

"Okay." My mouth seemed to only want to spit out monosyllables. The lump in my throat wouldn't allow anything more. But the way Courtney was looking at me dissolved the obstruction.

"Take care of each other guys. You'll always be in my heart. And when we all go to Solara, let's find each other again."

"You can bet your life Mark and I will find you."

And with that, Courtney gave me a gentle push. I took the hint, and started running back to the Taj Mahal. Looking over my shoulder, I saw Mark and Courtney holding hands. I smiled despite the heavy atmosphere. They were going to be okay. They were going to rebuild the world. They had each other.

As for me? Well, with every step I took, my heart felt lighter. The day turned out much better than I thought it would. I still had my friends behind me, loving and supporting me. I was about to find out what my future looked like. I could think about being with Loor.

Loor. That name made my heart flutter. Loor. So many emotions surged within me. Hope, eagerness, and love. Loor. Warrior girl on Zadaa. Loor. Maybe future girlfriend? Nope. I shouldn't think about that yet. I had to get there first and explain my situation to her.

Panting slightly, I reached the steps to the Taj Mahal. Bounding up the stairs two at a time, I burst into the large hall and found Uncle Press sitting on the floor. He quickly sprang up and looked at me questioningly.

"Uncle Press! I'm going to Zadaa! Mark and Courtney were totally cool about it. Well, not totally, but everything is okay. Or okay as it can be. Did all the Travelers already leave? Where is everyone? What happened?" I nearly shouted as I bulldozed into him.

Uncle Press gave me a big smile as he stumbled back from the force of my hug.

"That's pretty awesome. Sit down Bobby and I'll fill you in."

I obediently sat on the cold marble. He sat too, stretching out his legs.

"I called all the Travelers back and gave them the choice to either go to Solara or spend one lifetime on a territory of their choice. Long story short, everyone went back to his or her own territory. Loor wanted to look for you but I sort of gave her a hint that it would be better for her to go back to Zadaa. So she did," Uncle Press said mischievously.

"That sounds great. Can I go to Zadaa now?" I answered, trembling with anticipation. Loor looked for me? That was good news.

"Yes, you may. All you have to do is think about Zadaa and take a step forward."

I pushed myself up. Surveying the room, I took my last breath of Earth air. Just as I was about to step, I stopped and looked at Uncle Press.

"You know, when I was fourteen, I was ready to disown you as my uncle. Because there were some seriously uncool things that happened. But now, I can't thank you enough for trusting me with Halla and its people. So I guess what I wanted to say was that I'll miss you. Where are you going, by the way?" I scuffed the floor with my shoe, feeling ridiculously sentimental.

"I knew you'd thank me one day," Uncle Press joked. He shoved my shoulder playfully and I was about to shove him back when I pulled him into another hug. Boy, was I sappy today. But today was just one of those days, you know? It's kinda hard to not get all mushy when you're saying bye to the people you love.

"As for me, I'm going back to Solara. To watch over everyone."

"Like, even when I go to the bathroom?" I laughed as I remembered saying that to Uncle Press when he started to tell me about being a Traveler.

He gave me an exasperated look before stepping away.

"Okay Romeo. Go on and chase Juliet."

I rolled my eyes but couldn't help smiling again.

"Bobby, you know, I'm very proud of the man and Traveler you've become. Now, it's your time to be happy. Hobey-ho."

Uncle Press always knew what to say. Closing my eyes, I thought about Zadaa. The warm sand underneath my feet. The glistening pyramids. The fountains brimming with cool, clean water. Saangi and her infectious smile. And Loor. The way she looked at me that night in the rain. How radiant she was. The light reflecting off her brilliant white teeth. The gleam in her dark brown compassionate eyes. The fragrance of hibiscus and jasmine on her skin.

I stepped forward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading


	3. You Kill Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby finds Loor.

The sun poked me in both eyes. Hard. Did I just go blind? I rubbed them and blinked. Okay, whew, I could still see. It would kind of suck if I finally got together with Loor, but couldn’t admire her flawless face. I took a breath and looked around, trying to get my bearings. What the hell? Was this even Zadaa? Maybe I did go blind. I rubbed my eyes harder and opened them again. Nothing changed. 

I felt perplexed. This should be Xhaxhu, Zadaa. Unless Uncle Press messed up and put me on a different territory. Nah, Uncle Press didn’t really mess up. So, this must be Zadaa. But, how? From what I remembered, Xhaxhu looked like hell. Literally. Filth filled the streets. Beggars clogged the roads. Everyone pretty much smelled like very bad B.O. Yeah, it was pretty horrible. Especially if you stepped into a pile of poop and couldn’t tell if it was from a dog or a human. Not that I’m speaking from experience. 

But now, everything looked clean. Like, eat off the floor clean, which is saying a lot cause the floor’s hard packed dirt. Sparkling water ran in the troughs lining each street. Large houses gleamed white and gold in the sun. Nothing was dusty, even though Zadaa’s literally made of sand. Which meant the people here had some serious cleaning game. Ornate fountains dotted courtyards, spraying water in intricate spirals. I still remembered that time when Saint Dane hoarded all the water on Zadaa and people fought to the death over a well. I watched people try to lick the bone-dry troughs for water. Back then, Xhaxhu looked so different from the picturesque town I saw now. All I could say was, if every city on Zadaa looked like Xhaxhu, things had to be pretty amazing on this territory. This is what Xhaxhu should look like, an oasis in the middle of a desert. 

I stood there, drinking in the scene for a few minutes. Something felt off. Where was everyone? I spun around. The streets were completely deserted. The stillness kind of creeped me out. Xhaxhu looked so alive. The streets should be teeming with people. But the whole place felt desolate.

My heart raced. Did something go wrong when I came? Did I somehow upset the balance of Halla? Great. Right after we got rid of Saint Dane I just had to screw things up. I almost made up my mind to step back to Solara and ask Uncle Press what happened when a roar of sound made me jump. I swiveled in the direction it came from. The city square. Relief coursed through my system. Okay, that made sense. Everyone was probably at a game or something. That’s why no one was out and about. I relaxed and started walking towards the square. I’d probably be able to find Loor there, too. She was usually in the thick of things. Thinking about her made me quicken my step and smile like a dork. I was actually going to see her. This wasn’t a dream. Everything was coming together perfectly. I started sprinting.

Man, it was hot. I pumped my legs harder. The sooner I got to the square the sooner I’d be able to find some shade and sit down. Sweat trickled down my back. I didn’t want to think about the huge stains under my arms—oh crap. I stopped in my tracks and looked down at my clothes. I was still in my Third Earth gear—I completely forgot to change. Well that wasn’t exactly my fault though. Usually I’d just pick up the stuff alcolytes left at the flumes. But the flumes were gone. Acolytes were gone. No one would be taking care of me anymore. Frantically ducking into a nearby doorway, I hunched over. I must’ve looked like some sort of indecent weirdo, the way I tried covering my body with my hands. Leaning against the door, I tried to figure out my story. 

Another wave of sound rolled through the city, distracting me. I was missing the show! I deliberated for a second before walking back onto the street. It’s whatever. I decided that if someone asked, I’d just pretend I was from a different tribe. That worked well enough on Loor’s Rokador friends, Bokka and Teek. I told them I came from the Yankees tribe and I lived far away from Xhaxhu. They probably didn’t buy it completely, but hey, they didn’t question me too much. I crossed my fingers. Hopefully the same thing’ll happen this time.

The closer I got to the square, the more apprehensive I became. I didn’t actually think about what I would tell Loor. How I would tell her that I abandoned Mark and Courtney for her? My old fears rushed back. What if she hated me? What if she called me a coward and a disloyal brat and threw me out? Where would I even go? I forcibly pushed those thoughts out of my head. I’d just have to wing it and hope she accepted the fact that I loved her more than my friends and chose her over them. And if she hated me for it, well, at least I tried, right? 

I finally reached the square. No one was in sight, but I could hear the murmur of many different voices. I looked around for a staircase that would take me to the balconies. Oh, for those of you who haven’t read my journals, the Xhaxhu city square basically looked like the Zadaa version of a baseball stadium. Four giant pyramids surrounded the four sides of the square. Each pyramid had multilevel balconies. Spectators sat in these balconies and watched the events unfold down below. I found a staircase leading up to the first tier balcony and started to climb. I’d forgotten exactly how huge these pyramids were because after a few minutes of climbing, my calves screamed in pain. Boy, was I out of shape. Panting and wheezing like some old man, I slowed down and pulled myself up using the handrail. At least Zadaa’s not humid. Not that it made much of a difference. I was pretty much drowning in sweat already. 

I finally made it to the top, gasping like a fish out of water. Doubling over, I put my hands on my knees and tried to even out my heart rate. These Batu guys must have calves of steel. Luckily there was an empty row of seats right in front of me, so I just plopped down on one and put my feet up. Did I mention how hot it was? Fanning myself with both hands, I took a deep breath and peered around. The stadium was packed to the brim. I saw children, couples, and singles all settling into their seats. Some had snacks with them, and others brought drinks. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think we were all at a baseball game on Second Earth. That’s how normal things seemed.

A sudden hush fell over the stadium as all the spectators focused down on the square. I looked too. And gulped. Two groups of three Ghee warriors faced each other from across the floor. All wore black leather armor and carried shields and swords. Very sharp swords, mind you. Each team also had a length of rope. This scene started to look very familiar. A lone Ghee warrior strode to the center of the square, where a huge zhou beast statue stood. He nodded at the two teams and addressed the crowds. 

“The challenge has been set. The stakes are clear. To the victor goes the right to control the destination for the new farm. The match will follow in the long tradition of the Ghee. Victory shall go to the warrior who cleanly severs two heads.” The guy turned to the two teams. “To the brave, we salute you!” He bowed and walked away. The crowd cheered loudly. 

Dread settled in my stomach. This was bad. I knew what type of game they were going to play. It goes something like this. A zhou beast is this giant black cat with two heads. Whichever team cuts off both heads wins the game. Sounds simple, right? Nope, think again. The zhou’s about twice as big as a lion, and five times more pissed off. Getting two heads while trying to fight off the other team is pretty much impossible, unless you’re a well-trained Ghee warrior with lots of luck. Also, anything goes. I’ve seen the warriors play really dirty. Once, the zhou almost bit a guy in half but his teammates just abandoned him. Loor tried to save him, but long story short, the other team sort of cheated and they won. Totally not cool. And definitely not fun to watch. 

I quickly scanned the warriors’ faces. I didn’t want Loor to be anywhere near here. My heart sank. Loor stood stoically on the far side of the square, sword and shield held ready. Her beauty momentarily sidetracked me. She looked absolutely stunning. My heart quickened. Her long black hair danced in the breeze while her skin glistened in the sun. The plain black armor accentuated her muscles, making her look even more badass than normal. I kicked the seat in front of me. Why did she always get herself into these things? Just as I got the opportunity to have a future with her, I found out she might die in front of my eyes. I paused in my train of thought, and sighed. Loor did explain it to me last time. It was probably her turn in the fight rotation and if she backed out, she’d be executed or banished. I sourly hunched down in my seat and folded my arms. Rules were rules. But, that didn’t mean I had to like them.

The crowd grew restless, waiting for the game to start. Anxiety made me sit back up again. Last time Loor fought, the zhou beast sliced open her shoulder like it was nothing. Saangi, her foster sister and acolyte, had to sew her up, in her living room of all places. What if she wasn’t as lucky this time around? What if the zhou took off her head? I started biting my fingernails. No, Loor could take care of herself. She saved Halla. She could take on this bad boy any time. I had to believe in her. That didn’t make me stop biting my nails though.

A movement caught my eye. I shifted forward in my seat, mouth dry. The gate on the far side of the enclosure started opening, its hinges creaking ominously. The crowd collectively waited with bated breaths. Down below, the warriors grouped themselves into their formations. Loor took point in her group, her two teammates flanking her. They raised their shields and faced the gaping black hole. Something big was coming. I gripped the edges of my seat so hard my knuckles turned white. My stomach flipped cartwheels like crazy, making all sorts of weird sounds. That was super embarrassing. The guy sitting in front of me turned and gave me a dirty look. He probably thought I had bad gas. I shook my head apologetically, and focused on the warriors. Things were about to get hairy. The wind whispered over the ground, but nothing else moved. You could hear a pin drop, that’s how quiet it got. 

With a horrible scream of rage, the biggest zhou beast I’ve ever seen burst out of the tunnel. It was freaking huge, about twice as tall as a carthorse and three times as wide! It stood on its hind legs and roared, scything the air with its claws. Red spots dotted its hide. Someone poked it with a knife before sending it out for battle. The zhou snarled again and came down on four paws. I winced and covered my ears. He had a set of lungs on him all right. It sniffed the air and growled, trying to decide which team to eat for lunch.

Loor’s trio made the first move. Taking advantage of the zhou’s hesitation, they sprinted toward it, spreading out their formation. Each warrior came from a different angle, swords drawn. The zhou twisted around and sprang at the nearest guy. He hardly screamed as the beast slashed at his legs, instead throwing his blade straight at its heart. A fountain of blood erupted from its chest, drenching Loor as she swooped in and dragged her teammate to safety. Her uninjured teammate desperately hacked at one of the heads before getting pulled away by the other team. The crowd screamed and booed. I just tried to not barf. Blood wasn’t really my thing. 

Loor tended to her teammate while the other guy stood guard over them. He was waiting for an opening. That left the zhou to the other team. They circled it, carefully testing for weaknesses. The chest wound didn’t seem to slow it down by much because it suddenly went for the middle warrior. I guess he didn’t think the zhou was that quick either cause he was totally unprepared. The zhou clamped its jaws down on his leg and dragged him a few feet. It shook its head violently. A single crack reverberated throughout the stadium. It flung the screaming man away and locked eyes with the remaining two.

The zhou lunged at the guy on the right. He was ready, neatly dodging the fangs and allowing his teammate to sink his sword into the exposed neck. Unfortunately, the zhou’s other head was functional, and it ripped the warrior away from his sword, tossing him like a rag doll into the air. The poor dude slammed into the ground and lay there, moaning with pain. The last guy must’ve realized he was a goner. He tried to run away, but tripped and fell. The crowd groaned as the zhou leapt at him, fangs bared. I couldn’t tear my gaze away, no matter how hard I tried. 

Luckily, Loor had hero syndrome. She took a flying leap and landed on the zhou’s back, distracting it long enough so the other warrior could crawl away. The zhou screeched again and twisted its uninjured head around, trying to reach her. She slid until she sat on its haunches, and drove her sword repeatedly into its back. The zhou bellowed with agony and bucked its hips, spraying blood everywhere. Sweat coated my brow. Loor couldn’t hold on for long with just her legs. The zhou gave a mighty heave. She somersaulted through the air, miraculously landing on her feet. Who was I kidding. She probably practiced that move on a daily. Seriously, that girl was too good. It was almost unfair how effortless she made it look. 

Loor lost her sword. Her teammate jumped into the fray, slashing at the beast’s face and drawing more blood. It roared and batted at him, but he danced away, trying to buy some time. Loor looked around for something—the rope. She ran and grabbed it, knotting a quick lasso. Swinging it above her head, she whipped it at the zhou, snaring one of its hind legs. The zhou tripped, falling onto its knees. In a flash, her teammate deftly pulled the sword from the zhou’s unguarded back, and threw it at Loor. She let go of the rope and plucked her sword out of the air so gracefully it looked choreographed.

The crowd applauded. Clearly, they appreciated artistry. I clapped too, but kept my mouth shut. The zhou had two swords sticking out of it, one in its chest and one in a neck. It already lost a lot of blood, and its movements looked sluggish. Weaving its heads drunkenly, the zhou beast advanced on Loor and her teammate. They pranced away from the claws, shields out and swords ready. Although the zhou was slower, they clearly weren’t taking any chances. It howled in frustration and swiped furiously, the sharp claws missing Loor by millimeters. She sliced down on the extended paw, laying it open to the bone. The zhou wailed. It gathered itself and dived at Loor, knocking her down. They rolled head over heels, Loor settling on the bottom. The crowd gasped. I watched in horror as the zhou let out a triumphant yowl, snapping its jaws hungrily. 

Time slowed down. Loor shouted wordlessly, her voice oddly distorted in my ears. She thrust her sword straight up, her aim true. Her blade carved right through its jugular. The zhou stiffened. It let out a bellow, but cut off suddenly with a strangled gurgle. Loor rolled out from underneath its body just as it collapsed, blood gushing from its neck. Her teammate pulled her up. They stood over the zhou beast and raised their swords. I finally closed my eyes. Two thumps.

The spectators went nuts, shrieking with excitement. I cracked open one eye and saw two heads rolling around on the ground. Ugh. They looked disgusting. But, at least Loor’s team won. Gosh, she’s freaking amazing. I opened both eyes and let out a shaky breath before standing up. I didn’t feel much like celebrating. I just wanted to be alone with her. To give her a big ol’ hug and a fist bump. And to let her know I was so glad she’s alive. 

I headed back to the staircase and thundered down the stairs, my impatience seeping through. I waited too long for this moment. And honestly, after watching that spectacle, I just wanted Loor next to me as soon as possible. I reached the ground and barreled right past the opening to the central square. Backtracking quickly, I sprinted through the tunnel. I could see Loor and her teammate help their hurt friend up. Medics attended to the other warriors. Geez, she didn’t even have a single scratch on her. In fact, she looked pretty great, considering she was covered in blood. 

“Loor!” I shouted her name as loudly as I could, unable to stop myself. 

She turned in my direction, dark brown eyes meeting mine. They looked as strong and compassionate as I remembered them. I was almost there. I could almost smell her. Could almost feel the softness of her hands as they caressed my face. I closed my eyes and extend my arms. I wanted to feel her pressed up against me. I wanted to sink into her and tell her we could be together. That Uncle Press, the Travelers, Halla, gave us another chance. 

A blinding pain exploded in my face. Stars popped in front of my eyes as I fell back with a cry. That really hurt. It felt like an elephant punched me. I blinked blearily, trying to feel my jaw. Blood trickled from my nose, turning into a steady stream. I looked up. Loor stood there, her hand clenched in a fist. 

“Who are you? And why are you trying to attack a Ghee?” 

Was this a joke?

“Loor? It’s Bobby! Bobby Pendragon? Lead Traveler?” My voice trailed off into nothingness. 

She gave me a blank stare. I felt my heart break.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was kind of sad to write.


	4. Now We're Getting Somewhere

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bobby gets tied up.

Loor stared down at me, her fists still in front of her face. I looked up, afraid that she was going to deck me again. 

“Speak up! What is your name?” her teammate shouted at me this time, brandishing his sword threateningly. 

I gulped. If he stabbed me, would I be able to heal myself? Or would I snuff it? I didn’t want to find out. But what should I say that wouldn’t put me behind bars or something? I didn’t really know how the new Zadaa operated yet.

“I’m, uh, a traveler. From far away. Like, very far away. And I wanted to see the game,” I stammered. It was probably better sticking with a rational explanation before going all meta with the Halla stuff.

“That much is obvious,” he scoffed, glancing down at my clothes. “But why were you trying to attack a Ghee?” He lowered the sword until the tip pressed against my heart, drawing a tiny droplet of blood. 

“No! I wasn’t trying to attack anybody. I just got excited that you guys won so I wanted to give Loor a hug!” I said, trying to shift away from the sword. 

“How do you know my name? I do not think we have met before.” Loor looked at me curiously, drawing her own sword.

This was going in the completely wrong direction. Why did she forget our past? Uncle Press didn’t warn me about this! I made a mental note to ask. That is, if I managed to not end up skewered like a kabob. 

“You’re a very famous warrior in my tribe. Everyone knows who you are, Loor,” I talked fast, thinking hard. In case you didn’t know, it’s kind of difficult coming up with good lies at the point of a sword. Loor and her friend turned and gazed at each other, holding some intense nonverbal conversation. I observed them warily, afraid to move a muscle. Flies buzzed in the air, one landing on my leg. I twitched, trying to get it off. The guy spoke and I instantly froze again. 

“I do not believe him. This is not a big tournament. Why would he come all the way here just to watch it? Shall I run him through for you? He may be an assassin,” he said conversationally, all the while pushing the point deeper into my chest. I screamed for help in my head. Loor stayed silent for a while longer. The guy gave me a cruel dig with the sword, making me yelp. That broke her out of her reverie. 

“No, not yet.” She restrained her friend with the tips of her fingers. “I want to interrogate him. If he is an assassin, he may hold valuable information, which we should extract before killing him.” 

Her friend regarded her for a moment. He abruptly pulled back his sword and sheathed it. 

“Very well, I will leave him to you.” He dusted off his palms. “He looks weak. A few strokes should do it.” 

With that, the dude slapped Loor on the back and walked away. A totally chummy move. A small twinge of jealousy coursed through me. My head was still buzzing from what he said. A few strokes? Of what? From a whip? 

“Get up. Make one false move and I shall strike,” Loor stated calmly, like she was telling me the weather forecast for the next several days.

“Okay, but please, tell me one more time that this isn’t a joke or something.”

She glared at me and motioned with her sword. My brain sort of went numb. I gingerly pushed myself up. This was real, all right. All I remembered was Loor taking the rope she lassoed the zhou with and knotting it around my neck. I didn’t fight it, but man did I hate it. It reminded me of the time on Eelong when Kasha and Boon put me on the gar leash and I had to walk like that in public. 

Loor led me out of the square and took a right turn. We passed by some more buildings and courtyards. With every step, the buildings got less intricate and more dingy. Large multistoried houses soon turned into one level bungalows made from mudbricks. These must be the Ghee barracks. As we walked by, warriors started emerging from doorways, inquisitively glancing at Loor and me. There weren’t any jeers or anything, which I suppose was a good thing, cause if the Ravinians were still running Zadaa, you can bet they probably would’ve thrown stones at me and killed me right then and there. I guess the people of the new Zadaa had more compassion. 

I wondered which building Loor had in mind. That question was soon answered. She took me right up to the longest shack at the end of the road. We entered. I blinked, trying to accustom my eyes to the dim lighting. They adjusted. I wish they hadn’t. Because we were in a torture chamber. Like, a real-life-Edgar-Allan-Poe-fantasy-styled room.

Cauldrons, posts, wooden beds, and manacles littered the floor. Whips, maces, chains, and other stuff I had no name for covered the walls. Shackles hung from the ceiling and human sized cages sat evilly around the room. Thankfully, none of the cages were occupied, but even in the dim light I could see the splotches of red that painted the floor. 

Loor marched me over to a wooden post. She untied the robe from my neck. I started massaging my throat, but she grabbed my wrists and forced them behind me. She backed me up against the post and lashed me to it, my wrists on either side. 

“Do not make a sound or I shall bind your mouth,” she threatened, leaning in close. Her scent engulfed me. 

I searched her eyes, desperately trying to find the Loor I knew, my Loor. Her expression remained guarded, closed off to me. I idly wondered how she could still smell so sweet and feel so soft, but look so unfamiliar. Was this the end? A single tear trickled down my cheek, the wetness carving a trail down my neck. I couldn’t help it. But, that seemed to soften her up a little. 

“You will remain here until I determine you are not a threat. And then you may leave. I am sorry if you are just a traveler here to watch Xhaxhu’s games, but I cannot let you endanger our city.”

With that, she turned on her heel and marched out the door, pulling a cloth over the opening. It was just like her, putting the city first. I stood there, feeling all sorts of emotions. Was I angry? Yeah. But I think I mostly felt lost and sad. Not to mention pathetic. What had I done to deserve this? I couldn’t think straight. My legs shook from exhaustion, my mind blank. I closed my eyes and leaned against the rough post. It was cooler inside the hut and super dark. All was quiet. I took a deep breath. And another. 

“Enjoying your time yet?” 

I jerked my head up. 

“Uncle Press?” I nearly screamed.

“I’m right here Bobby.” 

I turned around and saw him standing behind me, hands in his pockets. What the hell? I looked down at myself. I wasn’t tied to anything. I looked back at him, totally confused. Where were we? We stood in this grassy meadow under the blue sky. No one else was around, but I swore I could hear people singing.

“You’re dreaming, Bobby. Relax, remember when I told you Solaran spirits can talk to you through dreams?”

Oh, right. He did mention that. 

“So, what’s going on?” he prodded.

I finally found my voice.

“What’s going on? You tell me what’s going on! I got to Zadaa and Loor doesn’t remember a single freaking thing! She thinks I’m this assassin who’s going to kill her! She locked me up in a torture chamber and says she’s going to extract information from me! She might kill me! This is crazy! What the hell is happening?” I ranted, furious that Uncle Press didn’t warn me about any of this.

He let me rage at him until I couldn’t breathe. Regarding me carefully, he sat down on the grass. I hesitated for a moment. But I walked over eventually, letting myself drop to the ground. 

“So, I gave that whole spiel about how Travelers could choose to spend one lifetime on a territory of their choice. If they returned to their own territories, they chose normalcy, meaning they’d forget everything. Their lives would’ve taken their normal courses. Does that make sense?” he explained.

“I guess. But why didn’t I forget?” I shot back testily.

“Well, if you chose Second Earth, you would’ve forgotten too. But you didn’t. You chose to go to a territory you’re not originally from. You mixed territories again. And to do that, you must’ve known there were other territories besides yours. That realization is not erasable, cause if you forgot you were originally from Second Earth and not from Zadaa, you’d be worse than nothing. You’d have no idea who you are or why you’re on Zadaa. You’d be a lost spirit. Which is why you had to keep your memories. Otherwise you’d go insane.”

“So, you can only remember your original territory. And you can’t make me think that I’m from Zadaa cause I’m not? And Loor forgot everything because she went back to Zadaa?”

“Exactly, Bobby.”

“Wait a minute. You said Loor wanted to look for me on Third Earth! But you told her to go back! To Zadaa!” I shouted, my voice rising.

“Yes, I did,” he replied evenly.

“And I bet you didn’t tell her that she’d forget everything if she did go back! Why did you do that? You’ve made everything impossible!” I roared at him, springing to my feet. Uncle Press screwed me over.

“Think about it, Bobby.” He remained calm, sitting on the ground and staring me down.

I breathed hard, my hands clenching and unclenching. Okay, why would Uncle Press do that? He always looked out for me. He wouldn’t ever hurt me. But, that didn’t mean he handed everything to me on a silver platter. He liked giving me challenges to prove myself. To show how much I cared. How much I wanted something. Was this another one of those challenges?

“If Loor forgot about me, I’d have to spend more time making her like me again. There might be a chance she won’t even fall for me, but I’d try all the same. Because if I didn’t try, it would mean once things got hard between us I’d just give up. This is to prove that she is worth it. That I really actually want her for her, and not because we spent years together fighting Saint Dane,” I started slowly, trying to figure it out. 

Uncle Press nodded, a small smile spreading across his features.

“And she went back to Zadaa, not because she didn’t chose me, but because you told her to, right?” I asked with growing certainty.

“Yes, that’s right. Go on,” he responded.

“I chose her. I left my friends for her. I was selfish for her. And maybe, she isn’t that selfish. Or rather, maybe you didn’t want her to have to make that choice.” I paused, a new thought occurring to me. “Was it a chivalry thing?”

“Kind of. As the Lead Traveler, you have to make sacrifices. You take all the bad, give others an easier time. That’s what it means to be a leader—getting the short end of the stick. Which is why you should be the one chasing Loor and making her remember why she loves you. I’ve watched you grow up. I know the spirit in you. I think you can do it. And yes, you need to know that you want to be with her not because of circumstance, but because of love,” he finished, standing up. 

I glowered grumpily at him. That was a lot to take in. 

“Do you understand?” He gazed right back. 

“Yeah, I guess. But, I think I do love her, not just cause she’s hot and she saved my butt so many times,” I said.

“Perfect. Prove it then. Prove it to yourself and then you’ll be satisfied.” He ruffled my hair.

I relaxed a bit. Well, okay then. To be completely frank, I didn’t want Loor to have to choose between Zadaa and me. That should be my baggage. And, this was a good way to show exactly how much I wanted her. I hated to admit it, but Uncle Press did the right thing under the circumstances. Something else nagged me though.

“Another question. I thought the Ravinians just got through with Zadaa. How come everything’s so clean? Did we go back in time?”

Uncle Press laughed. He slung an arm around my shoulder and gave me a reassuring squeeze.

“That one’s easier to answer. No, you didn’t go back in time. The whole Saint Dane battle happened, but because we saved Halla, everything that you see is product of the normal course of life on each territory. It’s kind of like Saint Dane never existed. Time just went on for those four or five years since you joined the fight, leading up to now.”

“So, that’s why Zadaa looks this great. Did Second Earth go back to normal?” 

“Yes, it did. I know I said there would be no more Second Earth or First Earth, but that was before I gave everyone the choice to go back. Anything else you want to ask?” 

Wow. So Courtney and Mark would be in college now. I briefly wondered what they were up to. If Courtney played varsity soccer and if Mark went to MIT. I pulled myself back to the present and thought.

“If Loor decides to kill me, will I end up on Solara?”

Uncle Press stiffened and gave me a dark look. I didn’t like that.

“Don’t get killed,” he said simply.

“What—!” I choked.

Water filled my nose and ears, drenching my skin. Coughing and sputtering, I shook my head, trying to clear my eyes. A pair of leather sandals swam into view. 

“Pendragon. It is time to begin.” 

Loor stood there, a dripping bucket in one hand and a whip coiled in the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was sort of fun to write, figuring out all the intricacies of the Pendragon universe.


	5. Just Take Me With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loor interrogates Bobby with a whip. Bokka comes by to see what's going on.

Yeah, that wasn’t one of the better ways I’ve woken up. Especially when the girl of my dreams tied me to a pole and wanted to whip me. 

“You will answer my questions truthfully. If you are who you say you are, you have nothing to fear. But if I find out that you are lying and a threat to the people of Xhaxhu, I have express permission from the Royal Family of Zinj to dispose of you as I see fit.”

She left the statement hanging. It sort of made me want to pee because it sounded so scary. But I had bigger problems. Like what my story was and if Loor could verify any of the details. Before I got a chance to think, she started.

“Why are you here?” Loor asked. 

“Because I wanted to watch the zhou beast match,” I replied quickly. 

“These matches are not advertised. How did you hear of it?” Loor shot back.

“From a friend,” I said. 

“What is this friend’s name?” she countered.

“It’s, uh, Spader,” I muttered. Don’t judge. That was the best I could come up with at the time.

“I see. And does this, Spader, live in Xhaxhu?”

“No. He came to visit a friend here and heard about this match, so when he came back he told me about it.”

“So, you heard about this small game in a faraway city from your friend and wanted to come watch. Yet you did not even bring your friend.”

“Er, yeah. Spader had a cold.”

Loor scoffed. I just looked at the floor. I couldn’t help it. I was never a really good liar. But, it seemed like these Zadaa folks didn’t do much traveling so I was hoping that Loor wouldn’t be able to check up on anything. Or else she’d find out that the Red Sox tribe didn’t exist.

“What is this other friend’s name? I am assuming he or she lives in Xhaxhu?”

“I don’t know,” I admitted. 

Loor cocked an eyebrow. I didn’t blame her. The whole thing did sound pretty sketchy and she could probably see through all of it. I gave her an apologetic smile. That was a mistake. 

“Are you laughing in the face of a Ghee?” she growled, uncoiling the whip.

“What? No! I, er, I have this facial nerve problem and sometimes my lips just pull up,” I hastily lied. 

She stopped uncoiling the whip. I breathed again. 

“Do you have any other information for me? Something that could prove your innocence?” Loor asked.

I shook my head. Better to keep quiet or I’d start losing track of everything I said.

“I can neither confirm nor deny that you are speaking the truth. All I have is your word, which I cannot trust,” Loor began again.

That hurt. Sure, I was lying. But like, wasn’t it justified? I mean, don’t get me wrong. It felt terrible having to lie to Loor, especially when I knew she once knew about our past. And that’s the thing. She did trust me before this mess, and this interrogation thing would’ve never happened. The whole situation just felt ridiculous. And sad. 

“You are not safe. But it is against the spirit of Xhaxhu to hold you if you harbor no ill will towards the people. What would you do in my position, Pendragon?” she asked, fixing me with those deep brown eyes.

Imagine your best friend who’s literally saved your butt and told you that she loves you. Imagine her standing in front of you and looking at you. And then imagine that you can’t tell her you love her, that she’s completely forgotten you, and that she thinks you’re out to kill her. Pretty heavy, huh? But guess what, most people can only imagine. No one’s that unlucky. Besides me of course. 

“Well, I would try to trust me for starters, you know, the whole innocent until proven guilty thing,” I said slowly, trying to gauge her reaction. 

She remained impassive, waiting for me to continue. I fidgeted nervously but plowed on.

“And I’d let myself out but keep an eye on me,” I finished. 

That was the best plan I had. If Loor could keep me with her, maybe I could show her that I wasn’t some lunatic who wanted to kill her. Instead, I was the lunatic who was madly in love with her and followed her across worlds. Gosh was I lovesick. 

She put her hands on her hips, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. I felt a bead of sweat trickle down my neck. Did I mention how hot it was in here? 

“Very well. I shall speak with my superior,” she finally decided.

Before I could thank her, someone came through the door.

“Loor!” an oddly familiar male voice exclaimed.

We both turned our heads. 

“Bokka!” Loor’s face broke into a breathtaking smile, her white teeth gleaming against her dark lips. 

Oh, right. Bokka. The guy who Loor totally had a crush on and would’ve dated had she not found out she was a Traveler. But he was a Rokador. What was he doing above ground?

“I looked everywhere for you. Why weren’t you at Mooraj? We needed you for the preparations,” Bokka asked as he strode into view. 

He was just as good looking as I remembered. Like, annoyingly good looking. But totally not my type. Nor Loor’s if she knew what was good for her. In retrospect, that may have been jealousy talking.

“I had an interrogation to attend to. Besides, you are more than capable at handling those recruits,” Loor replied playfully, pulling Bokka into a hug. 

I tried not to gag. Their PDA was way overdone. Seriously, who actually hugs for that long? Bokka still had his arms wrapped around Loor as he peered over her head. He looked at me like I was some disgusting glob of goo on a toilet seat. 

“Who is he?” he probed.

“He goes by Pendragon. He says he’s a visitor, but there is a possibility he is an assassin.” 

Bokka’s eyes grew wide at this. He disentangled himself from Loor and took the whip from her. Crap. 

“Listen—,” he tried to say. 

Loor quickly stepped in front of me, her black hair brushing my chest. That was surprising. And oddly comforting. I didn’t know she’d do that without even knowing me. Bokka looked taken aback. Loor used this opportunity to grab the whip and hide it behind her back. 

“I have already questioned him. He seems like a non-threat right now. I will to put him under close surveillance before releasing him,” she stated.

Not going to lie, it sort of made me happy that she was on my side. More than sort of.

“But, who will take him in?” Bokka asked, eyes suspiciously darting back and forth between us. 

“I will. I’ll put him under Saangi. It will be a good experience for her, managing a suspect,” Loor replied. 

Bokka looked unconvinced. I probably looked like Christmas came early.

“I can handle this,” Loor reassured him.

Bokka still looked skeptical, but didn’t argue. I felt relieved. When you go from probable execution to living with your best friend you’ve kind of fallen in love with, it’s impossible not to feel happy. 

“Will you bring him to your home right now?” Bokka asked. 

Loor nodded as she turned around and started to undo the knots binding me. When ropes fell away, I stumbled forward, all feeling gone from my legs. Loor caught me before I face planted in the dirt. For a moment, I pressed up against her warm body, and wow, did that take my breath away. 

“Thanks,” I muttered against her shoulder. 

She didn’t respond but didn’t let me go either. She was still slightly taller than me, but not by much. I gave myself another second to inhale her scent before stepping back, looking into her face as I did so. For a moment, our eyes met. 

A beat. 

You know, I never really understood what it meant to see fireworks in your head. I guess I just never had such a mind-blowing experience. 

Until now. 

Because I swear, Loor looked at me like—like I was the only person in the world. Like she actually remembered who we were and what we did. Like she actually cared. In that moment, I understood why I was here. 

Because for her, I’d give everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading =]


	6. Freedom (?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loor releases Bobby.

“What are you two doing? Move!” Bokka gruffly said, giving me a hard push. 

Damn that guy had muscles! I drunkenly staggered to my right and almost fell flat on my face, breaking eye contact with Loor. So not cool. Out of my peripheral vision, I saw her start slightly and tremble, her forehead creased. But before I could analyze that any further, Bokka roughly yanked me upright. What was up with this dude? I wanted to deck him in the face but he was the big shot right now. And besides, he probably had a good fifty pounds on me and a whole lot more training. I’d end up with some broken bones or worse if I so much laid a finger on him. So, I settled for giving him one of my trademark zingers.

“Geez, you’re really a big bad boy aren’t you?”

Bokka scoffed but didn’t take the bait. He looked at Loor again while keeping a firm grasp on my neck.

“What happened Loor? You were looking at him like you recognized him.”

Loor slowly shook her head, eyes clouding over with confusion.

“For a moment I thought—never mind. It is of no importance.”

Bokka opened his mouth as if to question her further but I beat him to it. 

“I know you! Come on, Loor! Remember!” 

My head snapped to the side as Bokka hauled off and slapped me across my face, hard. 

“Silence! You cannot know her! Unless you are admitting that you are a spy! How else would you know one of our Ghee commanders?” Bokka shouted in my face, shaking me like a rag doll. 

“I, uh,” I sputtered, desperately trying to figure out how to trigger Loor’s memory again. But what Uncle Press said to me stopped me from trying. Because to Loor, nothing extraordinary ever happened. And whatever she remembered or seemed to remember wasn’t real. It may have been true, but it wasn’t real to her. 

“Answer me!” Bokka shook me harder, making my face throb.

“Bokka, stop! We do not treat prisoners like that unless they have given us a clear reason to distrust them!” Loor intervened firmly, her hand clamping down on his arm 

Bokka and I both looked at her. Her eyes looked distant again, disaffected demeanor back in place. Bokka was silent for a long second as he gazed into her eyes. She stared back unblinkingly. Something shifted in his face.

“I trust your judgment,” he finally said, releasing his hold on me.

I rubbed my neck and straightened up, in no mood for further conversation. Bokka left my side and wrapped an arm around Loor’s waist, all affectionate-like mind you. Man, did that guy know how to make me mad. I think it was also a testament to my will that I didn’t start hitting every inch of him that I could reach. He was putting his hands on Loor for crying out loud! And okay, I started to realize how unreasonable I sounded and I totally didn’t own Loor in any way, shape, or form but I couldn’t help feeling a bit possessive. I mean, come on! We fought for Halla together. What did Bokka do, huh? Nothing besides act like a tough guy. 

Before I could get an aneurysm, Loor casually twisted out from under his arm, a faint expression of distaste on her face. Not going to lie, that made me sort of happy in a petty way. But before I could really start feeling smug, she came up to me and grabbed the front of my shirt. 

“Make one false move and I shall end your life,” she warned again.

Loor sure knew how to be romantic.

“Yes sir! I mean, ma’am,” I replied quickly. 

She gave me sort of a condescending look before turning around and motioning for me to follow her. I gave Bokka a cheeky wink before stepping out of that smelly compound. That wasn’t the smartest thing to do. My face really hurt—even moving my eyelids made me want to cry. And it was all for nothing. Bokka remained impassive as he followed me. I could feel his breath down the back of my neck—that’s how close he got. He really had no sense for personal space.

“Loor, I need to return to Mooraj to train the recruits. Are you certain you can handle this one?” Bokka asked gently, stepping in front of me and putting a hand on Loor’s shoulder.

“Did I not sever the zhou head earlier today?” Loor shot back confidently.

Bokka laughed good naturedly at that. It was amazing how he could get all his gleaming white teeth to show without looking creepy. He was as handsome as hell when he smiled, dimples and all. And he knew how to work his angles. A shaft of sunlight caught his hair, casting a resplendent halo around his head. He ran his hands through his crew cut and flexed, causing his biceps to pop out. That was more than I could ever hope for. The guy was a virtual Adonis. Even Loor looked a little bit entranced. 

“Yes, how could I forget? I will see you later then,” Bokka spoke, flashing Loor another smile before turning to me. 

He gave me another look, more challenging than anything, before sauntering away. I made a face. I mean, I much rather that he gave me a taunting look. He was just not a bad guy. He just wanted to make sure Loor was safe. And I couldn’t blame him for having a crush on Loor, cause I felt the same way. It was hard to hate him. Honestly I didn’t think I could ever be mad at someone who loved the person I loved.

Damn. I’m such a sap.

Loor watched as Bokka walked away. I swear, she almost smiled. I just grumbled to myself as I watched his back muscles ripple. No one should be able to look that good. But Bokka had it all. The body, the personality, and the girl. Okay, maybe I could hate him a little bit. 

Anyways, once Bokka disappeared, Loor grabbed another rope and bound my wrists together. Not too tightly to cause me pain but enough to let me know she was in charge. It was a waste, really. I mean, where would I run off too? I was stuck in Zadaa for good. Everywhere I looked, there were Ghee warriors oiling up for some afternoon wrestling session or hefting nasty looking spears. If I so much moved a muscle, those guys would be on me in a second. Not to mention if I so much put a toe out of line Loor would kick my ass. So yeah, the rope seriously was overkill but I wasn’t about to let her know that.

We walked out of the Ghee compound. As before, some warriors looked at me with open curiosity but most just went about their business. They really trusted Loor to take care of any trouble with me. Did I just look that weak? It was actually sort of offensive. But I’m a chill dude so I didn’t really think too much of it.

After passing through the compound gates, we walked on the main road for a bit. We breezed by the zhou stadium and turned right onto the main street that bisected Xhaxhu. There weren’t that many people about. Probably a good idea as it felt like a million degrees outside. Remeber, I was still wearing my Third Earth clothes and I literally boiled in my own skin. One Bobby Pendragon, medium rare, coming right up. 

Loor gave me a sideways glance when I started panting too loudly. She looked at the sweat pouring down my face and then moved towards the shade provided by the palm trees lining the side of the road. I guess she kind of felt sorry for me, but I didn’t dwell on it that much. She was just being a nice person, which just added more points to her hotness factor.

We continued walking in the shade. There were so many palm trees and they all were well watered by the troughs along the street. I looked around. Now that we were in the shade, I paid more attention to the architecture and scenery since I didn’t feel like an overcooked lobster anymore. I must say, Xhaxhu had it all going on. All the houses were beautifully constructed. They looked like Mediterranean mansions plopped down on a piece of scenic desert sand. Colorful ceramics decorated the walls while carefully painted tiles lined the courtyards. Every other house seemed to have a fountain that spouted water in intricate patterns—one fountain would continuously gush water in figure eights while another fountain would spurt water in perfect ellipses. They were mesmerizing and beautiful to watch.

“We are here,” Loor stated. 

“Where’s here?” I asked, my voice cracking from disuse.

Loor stopped and pointed at a rather large cuboidal house. It had a roomy courtyard in the front as well as a small stone fountain. There weren’t any fancy water spouters. That sort of fit in with Loor’s personality. Function before beauty. Anyways, everything looked spotlessly clean and neat. Small potted plants populated the sides of the yard, pushed against the white walls of the compound. A straw broom stood in one corner and a bunch of clay pots stood in another. Two identical cats prowled along the wall, both tan with black ears and feet. The whole place had this militaristic feel to it, but it didn’t feel cold. There were small touches here and there that made it more homey, like the hand painted designs on the pots. I picked out other details—like how each cat had a hand plaited leather collar around its neck. I smiled. The whole place just felt Loor-ish, in the sense that if you only took a cursory glance around, the house would feel rigid and cold, but if you paid a little more attention, you’d find signs of warmth. Leastways, that’s the best I could describe it. 

“While we have declared you as a guest of Xhaxhu, do not forget that you will be living with me. Consider this my final warning—if you attempt to harm anyone while under my roof, I will personally gut you in front of the entire city,” Loor said in a monotone.

“I won’t forget that,” I promised, trying to catch her eye. 

She gave me one more dead stare before leading me to the door, which basically was an intricately woven tapestry hanging in front of an opening in the wall. She pushed it aside and stepped in, holding it open for me. I nodded my thanks and walked in. A blur of motion by my feet caught my eye. One of the cats nimbly stepped into the house, rubbing itself against my leg. I grinned and looked up.

And gasped out loud. 

When I last visited Loor, she lived in warrior’s apartments. They looked very spartan. This time around, it couldn’t be more different. Don’t get me wrong, Loor didn’t bling out her crib or anything like that. But while the outside looked clean and simple, the inside was a blaze of color. Multicolor rugs hung on the walls, bathing the room in beautiful yellows, warm reds, and flaming oranges. More rugs covered the floors. My feet sank into one of them—that’s how luxurious the rug was. Low sofas marked the floor and painstakingly carved small tables accompanied them. I spied steps cut into the side of the right wall, leading upstairs. To my left, an arched doorway led to the kitchens and what I presumed was the dining room. 

I guess the Ghee made Loor a commander now and so she had some seriously cool digs. But something didn’t feel right. I wondered why she took the time to decorate. It always seemed like she was rushing from one problem to the next. Did she live with someone else?

“Loor? Is that you? Who is with you?” a familiar voice said.

Saangi! That made sense. I eagerly turned around, looking for the source of that voice. A strange tapping noise greeted my ears as I waited for her to appear. A hunched figure emerged from one of the archways to the living room and straightened up, a shawl falling away from her face.

I got my second shock.

The girl walking toward me right now held a cane in one hand and shaded her clouded blind eyes with the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Check out my tumblr [here](http://damian-knight.tumblr.com/) where I post story updates.


	7. Stories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get a little tense at dinner.

“Saangi? What happened to you?” I blurted out without thinking. 

Saangi started in alarm.

“Who is this? Loor did you bring someone I know?” she asked looking extremely confused.

Crap. I messed up again. I wasn’t supposed to know her name!

Loor apparently had the same idea. She narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms, but didn’t speak. I think she was trying to figure out exactly what to ask me. Or maybe she wanted to pummel me right then and there.

“So, explain,” Loor finally said.

“I, uh, Spader said you lived with someone named Saangi, and if I had trouble finding you, I could also ask around for her,” I quickly answered. 

“Spader? I don’t know a Spader, do you?” Saangi asked, turning her blind eyes in Loor’s direction.

“No, I do not. This Spader seems to know quite a lot about our lives here. The only explanation is that he is a spy of some sort. But if he were a spy, why send this weak boy here?” Loor mused, staring me down.

I silently gaped at the floor. Nothing was going my way today. I just had to hope I didn’t get thrown out on my ass.

Loor also seemed deep in thought. Saangi just sat with her brow furrowed. I guess she was used to letting Loor think and not interrupting.

The sun crept along the floor as we sat in silence. 

Finally, Loor spoke.

“The unknown is the worst enemy. I will allow you to stay here tonight, but at daybreak you must leave. That is final.” 

“But you said earlier I could stay as long as I wasn’t a threat!” I protested, not caring that I sounded like a whiny brat.

“That was before I knew that you knew the name of my sister!” Loor shot back, crossing over to Saangi and standing in front of her protectively.

I had to choke back a snort as I watched Loor cover Saangi and glower at me. As if I could attack Saangi. She’d probably be able to beat me up in her sleep with her pinky toe, blind or not. Well, daybreak was still far away. I’d cross that bridge when I got there. I mean, Loor had a point. Any sane person would get creeped out if a strange dude knew every detail about her life. 

On the other side of the room, Saangi reached out, taking Loor’s hand. Loor rubbed her thumb over the back of Saangi’s skin and smiled at her fondly. That kind look on her face sent a pang through me. How many times had she gazed at me with the same eyes? Okay, fine, I could probably count them on one hand but still, she did. And to think she would never do so again.

“Loor, are you hungry? I believe the bread is finished. Everything else is ready for dinner,” Saangi said, gesturing to another room. 

“Yes, the day has been long and I have not eaten since before the match,” Loor answered, pulling Saangi up and leading her to the other room. 

I dithered on the spot, unsure of whether or not to follow. 

“Are you not coming?” Loor threw over her shoulder as she pushed aside the colorful red cloth shielding the entryway, holding it open for Saangi.

That answered my question. I walked forward quickly, footfalls hushed by the thick carpet. The two cats padded around me, nimbly jumping through the arch before the cloth fell. I hesitantly reached out and pulled the fabric aside, my fingers brushing the intricately woven patterns of desert animals gamboling across the canvas. As I stared at the designs, I noticed something weird. I looked at the tapestry more closely—those animals looked almost exactly like the giant klee on Eelong! Sure enough, I thought I spotted Boon and Kasha multiple times in various poses. I even saw a couple of tangs. My heartbeat quickened. 

“Who made this?” I asked, shaking the tapestry wildly at Loor and Saangi who were sitting at a low wooden table laden with bowls filled with bread and fruit. 

Loor gave me a strange stare.

“I did. Now stop gawping and sit down like a civilized being,” she snapped, pointing at a chair next to her. 

“Where did you get the ideas for the designs?” I asked stubbornly.

That question unsettled Loor. She scanned the tapestry and then my face, searching for I don’t know what. 

“Why do you ask?”

Always the tactical one. She just had to know more than I did, be in charge. But I didn’t care in this case.

“Because I’ve seen those animals before,” I replied.

Now she looked unnerved and hesitant.

“Do you mean they exist where you are from?” 

I considered how to answer this question.

“No, not really. I’ve seen them in my travels. Have you?” 

“Didn’t you dream about them Loor?” Saangi interjected, raising her head.

Loor glanced sharply at Saangi before turning back to me. 

“I did—I dreamt about them,” she stammered, toying with a bowl.

“When? Recently?” I pushed, feeling excited and nervous. Maybe I wasn’t screwed after all!

“Stop asking questions and eat your food!” Loor ordered, clearly done with this conversation, flames almost shooting from her eyes.

I opened my mouth and closed it. Hungry Loor seemed dangerous. There would be plenty of time to talk about this later. But, hearing her dreaming about Eelong sounded interesting. Travelers could communicate with others through dreams. I wondered if Uncle Press gave her a few memories through those dreams to help me out. He probably did but didn’t tell me about it, that sly dog. 

I walked forward and sat down at the proffered chair, focusing my attention on the food. The dinner spread looked amazing. There were bowls of differently colored fruit, from small round things that looked like dates to large irregularly shaped pieces with spikes sticking out. Breads of every shape and hue clustered the table, sending forth tempting smells. Meat lined the middle with great hocks and drumsticks swimming in sauces. Loor handed me a loaf of bright yellow bread studded with red nuts. I gratefully accepted it and nearly unhinged my jaw trying to stuff it in. Man, was I starved! Saangi pushed a bowl of purple melon in my direction and I nodded my thanks before I realized she couldn’t see. 

I gulped loudly and said, “thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Saangi replied, munching on a dull green stick and smiling at me. 

Saangi had changed. She was a lot nicer than how I remembered her. Back when I was on Zadaa when Saint Dane was around, she’d always belittle me and try to seem impressive to Loor. It felt super lame then, but I guess she stopped trying to prove herself and grew up a bit during the last few years. But, I had to say, I did miss the old Saangi, with all her fire and eagerness. I really wanted to find out what happened to her eyes, but I was afraid Loor would take me apart if I asked. 

After a few moments of silent chewing, I decided to hell with it.

“What happened to your eyes?” I tried again.

Loor hissed at me, but Saangi raised her hand.

“It’s my choice if I want to speak about it, and his curiosity is genuine.” 

Loor looked abashed and concentrated on tearing apart a huge drumstick with her teeth. The corners of Saangi’s mouth lifted in a small smile as she stroked Loor’s hair. She took a deep breath and began.

“I was walking home from the marketplace one day when I noticed a man following me. I thought nothing of it at the time, but he kept walking after me, even when I turned onto the smaller side streets near home. It was quite dark at this point, but I had my stave and felt protected. Suddenly I felt a stinging pain on the back of my neck. I reached and found this thorn in my skin, but before I could do more than scream, I fell to the ground and knew no more. I woke up but the world had turned black. Bokka, Loor’s friend, found me. He carried me home. My sight has never returned,” she finished, a shadow over her face.

Silence hung over us, like a thick fog. I sat there, shocked and blinking, trying to think of something to say. What are you supposed to do after someone tells you that? Shock gave way to fury and I raised my head, meeting Loor’s burning glare unflinchingly. For the first time since arriving on Zadaa, I felt like we finally understood each other, our anger burning through any walls between us. She held my gaze a second more before something shifted in her eyes and she looked away, her jaw clenching and unclenching. 

After another moment, she spoke.

“Saangi, I swear upon the graves of my ancestors that I will find the monster who hurt you. And when I do …” 

She didn’t need to finish that sentence. 

We finished eating. I stood up and helped clear the table, placing the dishes in a shallow trench built into one of the walls. Saangi showed me how she could pull a lever and fresh water would flow out of one opening, allowing her to wash the dishes. The water flowed out the drain at the other end of the trench. It looked like Zadaa had gotten completely over its water shortage problem. Proof that Saint Dane hadn’t messed things up permanently for Halla. That thought made my spirits lift a little.

“So, anyone going to take me on a tour around here?” I cockily said to no one in particular. 

I looked over at Loor, who had spread an armful of scrolls on the table. She raised an eyebrow and proceeded to ignore me. I tried to brush the hurt from my face but she already buried herself in the thickest scroll and started making marks with a pencil. I guess she had to read army reports or something as a Ghee commander. I wondered if there were any wars going on at the time. 

“Why don’t you take a walk around the neighborhood? It’s not too dark out and the air outside feels lovely,” Saangi quickly said, sensing the awkwardness.

“Want to come with me then?” I asked her.

Saangi blanched.

“I don’t really like to go outside anymore, not until that man is caught,” she quietly whispered, shrinking into herself. 

Right.

“Um, well I’ll go by myself, I’m sorry,” I backpedalled frantically, feeling horrible. 

Loor sighed and stood up from the table, enveloping Saangi into a hug. They stood together, closer than I could ever get to either one of them. Where did this touchy feely Loor come from? Wow, that was insensitive of me. Her sister was freaking attacked, I should cut her some slack. But, I still couldn’t help the feelings of jealousy flaring in my stomach.

“All right I’ll just take a jog then,” I said, turning away from them.

“Don’t wander too far. I am still responsible for you until dawn,” Loor reminded me none too gently as she led Saangi to the table and handed her something that looked like a spool of thread and knitting needles. 

That did it. Tears suddenly pricked my eyes. Turning on my heel, I roughly pushed through the cloth that shielded the kitchen and stalked through the living room, only pausing when both cats hissed at me. No one seemed to like me around here. I almost ran to the door and burst through, striding through the courtyard and into the empty street. My feet pounded the sand as I sprinted away from Loor’s house. 

Coming to Zadaa felt like a huge mistake. Loor would kick me out in the morning and then where would I go? Convincing her that we knew each other seemed impossible, especially when I couldn’t show her anything Traveler related. I wouldn’t have believed Uncle Press I was a Traveler unless he showed me a flume, which he did. And even then, I didn’t consent to become a Traveler until I literally got thrown into disaster after disaster. How the hell could I get Loor to believe me? She already had a life here, Ghee commander and all. And she even had a boyfriend! She even told me that her and Bokka would have dated if she weren’t a Traveler. Seriously, what was I doing on Zadaa? The whole thing felt like a bad joke. I could never get Loor, I mean not to say she was something to be gotten. But the whole point of coming to Zadaa was so I could have a shot at spending the rest of my life with someone I loved. I chose Loor over Courtney Chetwynde! And here I was, even more behind square one. There was no possible solution. None. She would never ever love me back. 

That thought made me want to cry and break things at the same time.

I pushed myself harder, forcing myself to not think. Sweat poured down my face. Even though night had fallen, it still felt like I was swimming in a volcano. I gasped but worked my legs, my muscles screaming in agony. A sharp ache built up in my side as I panted and panted, trying to escape from my thoughts.

Wham! I fell flat on my face. Before I could comprehend what had happened, someone struck me across my stomach, knocking all the air out of me. I rolled away from the direction of the blow and tucked my feet under me, trying to get up. A heavy weight landed on my back and thick arms snaked around my neck, choking me. Red dots swam in front of my eyes as I clawed at the meaty hands, but whoever had me in a headlock was strong. Deep grunts told me my attacker was a guy, a big one at that. Loor said that strength wasn’t my best suit. I had to get out of fights with cunning. I stopped trying to get him to release me and pummeled him with my elbow, wanting to break a few ribs. He wasn’t expecting that and let me go, cursing under his breath. 

I pulled myself to my feet and started running. I heard him get up and start to chase me. Fear coursed through me and I took a sharp left, zigzagging between houses. I vaulted over a short wall and ran through someone’s vegetable garden, wheezing and massaging my throat. Climbing over another fence, I dropped silently to the ground, ears alert. A quick look around told me I didn’t recognize any of the buildings, but honestly I just wanted to lose that crazy guy. Seriously, what was with everyone hurting me on this territory?

I cautiously got up from my crouch walked past a few houses, trying to find the main road. Just at the end of another small alleyway, I saw a larger opening between two buildings. That must be it. I hurried through the side street. Yes, I could see the paved walkways and the palm trees lining the larger road. Just a few more steps! 

An excruciating pain split my head. I fell like a sack of potatoes. Heavy footsteps sounded behind me. A toe nudged my back, flipping me over. I groaned and weakly tried to push him away, but my ears were ringing. He just laughed, pulling me up by my hair. I hung limply and retched. He grasped me by my neck, choking me again. I scrabbled uselessly at his side, but I felt my strength ebbing away. Whimpering, I let my hands drop to his tunic, my eyes closing. With what little gas in the tank I had left, I tore a piece of fabric from his clothing and closed it in my fist.

The last thing I remembered was the full moon shining on a series of colorful tiles lining the wall of a nearby house.

Courtney, Mark, and I were playing soccer on this beach. They were really kicking my ass since it was two against one. As Courtney kicked the ball over to me, I tripped and fell down. Too sweaty and tired to pick myself up, I lay there, eyes closed and unmoving. Mark called my name, telling me to get up, but I just wanted to just stop playing. What was the point? I was too many points back anyways, so might as well call it. But Mark really got into my face, shouting in my ear to move my lazy butt and to not give up. I tried pushing him away but he punched me, yelling at me to move. I groaned and decided to open my eyes.

Loor’s face swam in and out of focus, her lips forming incomprehensible words. Loor? Oh, right. Reality sucked me back in. Pain blossomed over every inch of my body and I grimaced. Saangi stood nearby, wet cloth in hand. She gave it to Loor who gently wiped my forehead. I moaned and she reached down, caressing the side of my face with her fingers. Was I still dreaming? I tried pinching myself but I could barely move a finger. Loor shook her head and gazed at me, her eyes so, so soft. I could get used to this. My battered lips pulled up into a smile. It looked like I was wrong earlier. 

Loor did care about me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	8. I Meant Well

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are way more complicated than they seem.

I suppose that in a perfect world, things would always go according to plan, unconsciously. What I mean by that is it’s no fun when you know things work out because you want them to. The best feeling in the world is when unplanned things that could go wrong end up going right. Trust me, I should know. I’ve been to Veelox where Aja showed me what my perfect day would look like. And it was perfect because it felt spontaneous. I don’t really know where I’m going with this except that my life is anything but perfect right now. Anyways, let me catch you back up to speed on what happened after I had the crap beat out of me by some random guy in a dark alleyway. 

“Pendragon, can you hear me?” Loor asked anxiously, her large brown eyes filled with worry. 

“Yeeeees.” Man, even my tongue hurt when I said that. 

“How do you feel?” Saangi chimed in from over Loor’s shoulder. 

“Liasagarohs.” Whoops. I meant to say was, “like a sack of rocks,” but I couldn’t move my lips enough to enunciate.

“Saangi don’t make him talk. Pendragon, I want you to listen to me. Bokka found you and brought you back here. You’ve been unconscious for several hours now. I think what you should do is rest and regain your strength before we talk about this.”

Loor reached down and picked up a small earthenware cup filled to the brim with a black liquid. She held it to my lips.

“Drink this. It will help you sleep and heal.”

She tipped the cup and I swallowed what I could. It tasted like warm licorice. I felt myself slipping away. But this wasn’t a bad slipping. Loor was right here and I could stay with her for a while. I smiled internally and let my mind drift away.

“Been busy huh? Got knocked up within a couple of hours at your girl’s house.”

I whirled around. Uncle Press! He stood in the same meadow we were in earlier with a smirk on his face. I didn’t know whether to feel annoyed or happy. 

“Okay first off you know I’m not pregnant so quit with the knocked up business. And second, this is the wrong type of busy. Can you believe it? Some dude kicked my ass and now I’ve got bruises all over my face! So uncool!” 

“Oh come on, Loor’s taking care of you. Stop whining. You just have more time to convince her that you’re the one for her.”

“Hell no! She’s totally in love with that Bokka guy. And Saangi is freaking blind! That’s horrible,” I shot back despondently. 

Uncle Press’s face darkened. 

“I saw. Bobby, I called you back here for a reason instead of letting you just sleep.”

“What? So I’m not in Zadaa anymore?”

“Your body is but you’re dreaming again. Same protocol as last time. But what I’m trying to get at is something is not right with Solara.”

“What do you mean? It’s beautiful here. No dark mountains or anything…” The words died in my throat as I took a good look around. 

Uncle Press nodded. “You see that right, Bobby?” he said grimly. 

I sure did. In the horizon, so far away that I had to squint, I could just make out a black smudge. But something weird happened. The longer I looked at the smudge the more distinct it became. Suddenly I could make out grey mountains and clouds. They still looked tiny but definitely clearer than the smudge I’d seen seconds ago.

“What’s that?” 

Uncle Press crossed his arms as if to ward off the cold. 

“I don’t know Bobby. I’m going to go find out. I noticed that a couple of hours ago, but it may’ve been there for longer.”

“Can I go with you?”

He hesitated. 

“No,” Uncle Press replied slowly. “I think your attack and what’s happening here are related. Don’t ask me why, it’s just a feeling. But Travelers have good instincts and I know this is bad.” 

“So what do you want me to do?” I asked anxiously. 

“Stay on Zadaa. Keep your eyes and ears open. Figure out who attacked you. And find out more about Saangi. Then come find me and we’ll talk.”

I scuffed the ground with my foot. Great. Stay in a world where I literally got beat to a pulp multiple times in a row. Uncle Press must’ve sensed my distaste because he sighed and threw his arm around my shoulders. 

“Bobby, I know it’s hard. But you know who you are.”

Did I ever say I hated it when Uncle Press used that argument?

“Yeah, I know, I’m the Lead Traveler and I’m supposed to take all this BS when no one else can. But just let me be annoyed for a second will you?” I ducked out from under his arm and stared off into the distance. The black mountains didn’t look too friendly, and I didn’t want them growing any larger. This really was the best timing, wasn’t it. Just when the Travelers managed to beat all of Saint Dane’s army and restore Halla to its natural order, something else goes wrong. Why did I always get the short end of the stick? I thought I already paid my dues when I saved Halla the first time. 

I looked at the black mountains again. Lightning crackled high above them and sheets of rain pounded the sides. They looked even closer than before, slowly creeping along the grassy meadows of Solara. I shook my head. This is why Uncle Press and those other spirits chose me to be a Traveler. Because I would never stop fighting if something good was threatened. And right now Solara and Halla needed my help. 

There was really only one choice then. 

“All right. I’m ready.” 

Uncle Press patted my back before sticking his hands in his pockets. Weird. I didn’t notice that he was wearing black skinny jeans and a leather jacket like some motorbike dude. I looked down at my clothes. And yelped. I was butt naked! 

“What the hell? Where are my clothes?” I screeched, trying to cover my private parts.

Uncle Press barely cracked a smile as he snapped his fingers. Instantly I was wearing some tight khaki pants and a shirt—one of those long white ones with fake holes in them. So basically I looked like a hipster from Brooklyn. I didn’t even have time to complain about my clothes when Uncle Press spoke again.

“When you go back, make some friends. We’ll need allies.”

I nodded my head. Uncle Press gave me a small smile and raised his hand in farewell. A sudden thought occurred to me. 

“Wait! Do you think Saint Dane is behind this?” I shouted as Solara started fading away.

If Uncle Press responded, I didn’t hear anything. Instead I found myself staring at the ceiling of Loor’s house. And boy was I sore. Judging from the greyish light filtering through the door cloth, it was sometime between night and dawn. I strained my ears, trying to hear if anyone was moving about but nothing stirred. Where were Loor and Saangi? Probably still asleep in another room. I closed my eyes and tried to fall back asleep, but my mind was way too busy thinking about who could be behind all of this. Was this Saint Dane’s work? I thought we literally destroyed his existence. He couldn’t be alive again, could he? 

Something had been nagging me since the day I stepped foot in Zadaa. Uncle Press said the Travelers had finished their job and we had to go back to Solara instead of interacting with the physical world. What I did was unorthodox, asking him to give us another shot at a normal life. And Uncle Press gave in. But technically, I wasn’t even supposed to be here on Zadaa, or in any of the territories for that matter. I guess I never really thought about what the other Travelers were doing if I wasn’t in Solara. They must also be on territories too then, right? Uncle Press wouldn’t ever show favoritism by letting me come chase after Loor and not let Spader have a life with his acolyte Wu Yenza. Maybe that opened the doors for Saint Dane. Maybe he was back too and was causing all sorts of bad stuff to happen. Could I be the one who started all of this by not going back to Solara? 

That thought was so terrible I nearly threw up. 

The sound of sandals crunching dry sand outside in the front garden caught my attention. Who could be up at this hour?

“Loor? How goes it?” someone said. The faint swish of the door cloth accompanied this voice.

I tried turning my head to see who had spoken but that was like trying to move a fifty ton boulder. So, I swiveled my eyes around as far as they would go. I could just make out the edge of the person’s back. It was a guy, pretty tall, with some beefy arms. He had just stepped through the doorway and into the living room, letting the door curtain swing softly back into place. 

“Bokka? Is that you?’ Loor replied from somewhere behind my head. I heard her walk into the living room and yawn.

Bokka! What was he doing here? Didn’t he have to go train warriors at Mooraj?

“It is I. Did I wake you?” 

“No matter, I wanted to check on Pendragon anyways.”

Loor moved about the room but I couldn’t see her. How should I play this? Better pretend to be asleep so I could hear all they had to say. I swiftly closed my eyes. I debated if I should start snoring but that level of acting was out of my reach. 

“Is Pendragon doing all right?” Bokka asked.

“He is. He seems quite hardy. Already his wounds look better,” Loor quietly answered.

“I am glad to hear it.”

A sharp scratching sound greeted my ears. It sounded like someone was using a flint and steel to light a fire. Seconds later from behind my eyelids I saw the orange glow of a fire. Loor walk over to the water trestle and pull the water lever. The dull roar of water rushing into a pot filled the room. She walked back over to the fire and I heard her set the pot over the coals.

“Tea will be ready in a moment. Anyways, Bokka, I wasn’t able to ask you earlier, but I want to hear how it happened, how you found him.”

I heard Bokka sigh heavily. “Loor, it’s best not to relive the tale. I don’t think you would want to hear it.”

“What? Of course I would want to know! I am a Ghee commander, I must protect my city and that includes knowing what threatens it,” Loor stated emphatically.

“But Loor, it’s taken care of. I don’t want to go into the details on how I found him.”

There was a confused pause.

“And why not?” Loor asked with disbelief.

“Well, it is quite grisly. Even my stomach felt upset when I saw Pendragon.”

There was another pause.

“Just to be clear, you don’t want to tell me about Pendragon’s attack because you think I will be scared by you describing blood?” Loor quietly asked.

“Loor, I know you’re a Ghee commander and all but there are just some things better left unheard by your kind.”

I nearly jumped off the sofa. Was Bokka saying what I thought he was saying? Come on. He had to be smarter than that. Loor seemed to be thinking along the same lines as me.

“Are you insinuating that as a woman,” she began enunciating every syllable, “I should not sully my ears with tales of gore?” 

“Well the Rokador did not even allow women to join their ranks until recently, when we joined the Ghee army. And I’m not sure that’s a good idea—”

Loor snorted, cutting Bokka off. 

“I see. Bokka, regardless of my gender, the Council of Elders, which you know is half composed of Rokadors, saw fit to promote me to the rank of commander. You may be a Rokador and your people may have done things differently in the past, but that distinction is now meaningless. As your commanding officer, I demand you tell me what happened with Pendragon!” Loor snapped.

I wanted to clap and slap Bokka in the face. What a great comeback! I desperately wished I could see his face but alas I couldn’t. 

This time, the pause stretched for a full minute. 

“I have no choice but to submit to your orders Loor,” Bokka finally said unhappily. “I was making my rounds last night. As I passed the zhou stadium, I thought I heard something strange. It sounded like a fight. So I ran toward the noise and I saw this unfamiliar man wrestling with Pendragon. But when he saw me, the stranger ran away. I hurried to Pendragon. He was bleeding from the mouth and nose, and he had a wound on his head. I picked him up and brought him back here before going back to finish my rounds.” 

Suddenly, the teapot whistled. Loor walked over to the hearth and pulled it from the coals. I heard her pour the tea and smelled its sweet herbal fragrance. Cups clinked and Bokka muttered a word of thanks. He took a loud, slurping gulp.

“BLEH!” 

Hoarse coughs erupted followed by clay shattering. 

“Bokka!” Loor exclaimed.

More coughs. 

“The tea—it’s so hot!” Bokka gasped.

“Well, yes I just took it off the fire,” Loor matter-of-factly said. I swore I could hear a smirk in her voice. “I’m sorry your tunic is all wet. Leave it with me and I shall wash it and return it to you.”

Bokka mumbled something unintelligible. I heard him pull his shirt over his head and hand it to Loor. I opened my eyes a sliver and watched his muscles ripple as he stretched out his sixteen pack. Great. Like I could compete with that. Uncle Press told me to make some friends but Bokka’s one friend I’ll stay away from. I’m sure there are other guys here I’d be able to get along with. As long as none of them were husband material for Loor. Okay, I know that I was letting jealousy get the better of me and as Lead Traveler I should be more noble or something but come on, let me indulge myself in some self-pity right now. 

“Well, I’m off then,” Bokka said awkwardly. “Just give me that whenever you’re done.”

“I will,” Loor replied. 

I heard Bokka stomp over to the doorway. 

“Bokka?” Loor called out with a hesitant note in her voice. “I apologize for letting my temper get the better of me earlier. Thank you for bringing Pendragon to me and for trying to protect us.” 

He didn’t say anything, that ass. I kept my eyes closed as I listened to him stride out of the room and through the courtyard. Loor stood still for a moment before walking to the kitchen. I stealthily opened my eyes. She was holding his shirt, running the material through her fingers. I squeezed my eyes shut again angrily. Geez, she was so in love with him that she was willing to let him diss her and then make up like nothing happened. After a moment, I heard her getting things ready for the morning meal. There was a certain amount of slamming going on. I guess she wasn’t in the best mood after Bokka walked out on her. I decided I should wake up and nab some alone time with her before Saangi appeared. I mean, I love Saangi and all but sometimes it’s just easier making someone fall in love with you when you guys are alone.

“Ugh,” I groaned.

“Quit whining!” Loor barked. 

Yup, she definitely was grumpy. 

Swiftly changing tactics, I said in an angelic voice, “morning to you too. Could I have some water please?” 

Loor walked over to the water trough and filled a small brown cup. She glided back to me, belligerent expression on her face. I suppose she wasn’t used to being ordered around. But hey, I’m the invalid here. I get to act like a brat for a few days. As she walked toward me, the first rays of the morning sun streamed through the doorway and lit her up. 

Wow, did she look terrific. She had on a blue tunic trimmed with gold that fell to her knees. A golden circlet held back her long hair and gold bangles dangled on her arms. She reached the sofa I was lying on and held the cup to my mouth. I greedily swallowed. Nothing tasted as good as that water then, not even those sweet little melons on Faar. 

“Now that you’re awake, let me tell you what happened,” she said after I finished drinking.

“I already know,” I quickly answered, a little sheepishly. “I couldn’t help but listen to your conversation with Bokka earlier.”

Loor looked taken aback for a moment before she composed her face. She looked almost embarrassed. I guess she didn’t want me to hear all the stuff about her promotion and Bokka being some anti-feminist jerk. 

“Sorry, I know I shouldn’t have eavesdropped but I just woke up and I didn’t feel like talking yet.”

“It is all right. That saves me some time anyways.”

We lapsed in silence.

“Loor, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but what happened with your promotion?”

She looked down at the cup in her hands. I noticed she was trembling, with fury or fear I didn’t know. I started regretting asking when she took a deep breath and started.

“Bokka and I were seeking a promotion to commander about a year ago. He was a Rokador, I was a Ghee, and in the past the armies were separated. But now we have combined our forces to better protect Xhaxhu. Traditionally commanders have always been Ghee warriors because we are better trained than the Rokador. I did not want to go against Bokka for the promotion because I was afraid he might be upset with me if I won the title,” Loor explained, gripping the cup tightly. “We had to take a series of physical tests to prove that we were fit. I came in first by a narrow margin. The last hurdle was a cross examination by the Council of Elders. They do a moral assessment, to ascertain that we have the hearts to be commanders. During my examination the Council informed me that some Rokador and even Ghee had expressed worries that I was unfit to be a commander because I was a woman. The Council said perhaps my mental state was too fragile. I told them that I stood resolute. My examination lasted far longer than any other candidate’s. It was only at the end when they felt quite satisfied that this feminine fragility was nonexistent that they revealed Bokka was the one who brought up these concerns. He had sought to undermine me by gathering testimonies from nearly all the Ghee and Rokador officers about women being weaker in the mind than men. But the Council said I earned my place and awarded me the rank.” 

Loor raised her head and looked around the room as if to find an escape. Her expression was hard to read. She had just opened herself up to me. And I had to be very careful to not break this newfound trust. 

“What did you do then? Did you ask Bokka why he said that?” I asked gently.

A humorless laugh escaped Loor’s lips as she shook her head.

“What did I do? I became a Ghee commander. But I never spoke to him about this. Until today.” 

“Why not?”

Loor fiddled with Bokka’s shirt, not meeting my eyes. This was the first time I saw her indecisive about something. The Loor I knew would come out swinging and knock everyone out of the way if she felt like they were keeping her from a rightful title. But this Loor seemed more diffident. 

“I don’t know,” she said at last. “He’s my oldest and best friend. He couldn’t have meant ill.”

I lost my patience then, with Bokka, with this new Loor who didn’t know how to stand up for herself. 

“Ok first off, Bokka straight up betrayed you. He was a traitor and I don’t know why you let him stick around. He’s a piece of—”

Loor whirled around and thrust her face towards me. 

“Do not speak of him like that!” she thundered, her eyes ablaze. 

I must’ve looked scared as hell because as quickly as her anger came it seemed to evaporate. She slowly straightened, breathing hard. I noticed her gripping the cup very tightly, her knuckles white. After a moment, she pivoted and stalked out the room, the curtain swinging forlornly behind her.

Damn. 

I closed my eyes, feeling so very tired. I definitely could have handled that better. Bokka was her best friend and I shouldn’t have straight up called him a traitor. But still! She should have confronted a person who undercut her, right? Had I been in that position, I would’ve punched his lights out and then keyed his car, if he had one. I exhaled angrily. Why couldn’t she see that he was a bully and a jerk? And yet she still offered to wash his shirt for him like some kind of servant! What was going on with Loor?

“I wouldn’t judge her too harshly, Pendragon. She’s not used to seeing the world as as you do.” 

Saangi carefully strolled into the room. She made a beeline for me and sat down next to the sofa I was lying on. 

“What do you mean?” 

“I mean she is not used to being able to fight against her male friends because there is a balance of power that is older than the sun itself. Loor is the most loyal person I know, to a fault sometimes. She would let someone she loves walk over her if that would make them happy. It seems hard to believe but once she loves someone she loves them blindly,” Saangi chuckled. “And for the record, I am the only one allowed to make blind jokes.”

I laughed too but sobered up. I didn’t think about that. In my bid to be all feminist I forgot how the world looked to Loor. For Christ’s sake, they were in an era when women were only recently allowed into the military. Saangi’s right. I definitely shouldn’t have taken such a harsh approach with Loor, considering how differently we grew up. 

“Thanks Saangi. I’ll apologize when she comes back.”

“No matter. Your heart is in the right place. Perhaps she knows you’re right too and she’s upset with herself for not having the courage to speak to Bokka.” 

“Mhm.”’

We sat in comfortable silence for a while, me trying to sort things out in my head and Saangi letting the sunshine warm her hands. After a while, I felt her move slightly. 

“What is this?” she asked. She reached down and pulled out a dark piece of cloth from underneath her.

“Oh, I think that’s Bokka’s shirt that he spilled tea on earlier. Loor said she would wash it. I guess she must have dropped it when she left,” I said sulkily.

“Ah, well let me just put it in the trough for her.”

Saangi got up and picked up the shirt, shaking it out so it wouldn’t get wrinkled. Bokka certainly didn’t take care of his clothes very well. Dirt coated the shirt and one of the sleeves was ripped, its frayed ends trailing on the floor. Saangi frowned as she shifted her weight.

“What’s this under my foot?” 

I looked down. She was stepping on another piece of fabric. 

“I think you’ve got something stuck to your foot.”

Saangi reached down and picked it up. It looked like a pretty ragged piece of black felt. 

“Interesting. This feels like the same material as the shirt.”

“It might be. His right sleeve is ripped. That could be the ripped piece,” I offered.

Saangi brought the cloth and Bokka’s tunic sleeve together, running her fingers over them.

“Yes, I think the ends do match. I’ll have Loor sew it back on.”

“What’s this about sewing, Saangi?”

Loor stepped back into the room, avoiding eye contact with me. Apparently she was still mad at me but totally cool with Saangi. 

“Bokka’s shirt is ripped. Here’s the missing piece,” Saangi said, handing the shirt and ripped part over to Loor. 

“Ah, wasn’t that in Pendragon’s hand when Bokka brought him in?” Loor weighed the ripped piece in her palm. “How can it possibly match Bokka’s tunic?”

I stared at the shirt’s tattered seams. And then looked at the other cloth in Loor’s hand. That’s right. I did have something in my hand before I blacked out. I flexed my fingers. 

Empty. 

Crap.

The piece in Loor’s hand.

It looked like it had been torn off by a guy locked in a chokehold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading =]

**Author's Note:**

> Just a kid trying to write.


End file.
